Lupus is Flaring

“It’s unfair,” I think selfishly.

Lupus my living opponent,

challenging me,

at inconvenient times.

Crawling in my head.

making me wish I was dead.

Really? No but I do.

It hurts.

Hurts bad.

My back, I hate to stand.

My feet swollen,

The lungs make me cough.

Tight heavy breathes.

Every night charily on his horse visits.

He grabs the nerves in my leg

No particular spot

Charley twists the nerves and wakes me.

I’m not complaining.

I’m really not.

I take sleeping drugs

To have sweet comatose sleep.

So many Lupies are so much worst.

What right do I have to complain.

I just have headaches,

I’m little dizzy and a bit nausea.

Itchy, itchy, itchy

I had a rash all on my chest.

It could have been my face.

I sleep while the TV watches me.

So Doc says, “it sounds like a flare.

I’ll take a gallon of blood and we’ll see.”

I state firmly.

“I’m not going to take steroids, no I’m not!

I’m still trying to lose the last seventy steroid pounds.”

So until I know

what’s going on

I’ll go back to sleep.

I’ve been to the doctors a few times last week. I’ve been tired and having other issues going on. As this poems says the doc thinks it’s a lupus flare. If it is she says she’ll give me a Depo shot. I think that’s what she said.  If it is a flare I guess I’ll be seeing her more often. I’m having issues that’s pointing to my kidneys which I’m praying it’s not. But so is the life of a Lupie. Unpredictable health.  Stress is a trigger just as it is to so many other health issues. As my other blog Just Peanut Nut Butter and Jelly discusses I’ve been stressed for the last few weeks.

The truth of the matter I have been blessed health wise. So many Lupies suffer with a long variety of ailments. So if I have a little flare with no major issues so be it.

I have poems in progress and I plan to make Valentine cards to sell so I’ve been writing  these corny love poems. Ugh! I’ll share soon.