Possessed ~ Friday Fictioneer Story

Copyright - David Stewart

Copyright – David Stewart

Possessed

The children quickly ran screaming from the one room school-house, the moment Stymie started pouring gasoline from the jerry can over every desk, chair and shelf in the room. I paused at the door, turned and saw Stymie with a blank expression. . .No his eyes were distant.   He turned the gas can upside down and saturated his body. He struck a match and the next thing I heard was puff. There wasn’t anything I could do to help Stymie. As I ran I heard Stymie laughing and ringing the recess bell.

The firemen never found Stymie’s  body.

©Kimberly Wilhelmina Floria 02/21/14

Link to other stories Here

It’s time for Friday Fictioneer’s and I almost didn’t hang out this week.  I woke up with this story this morning. For those who haven’t heard Friday fictioneeer is an addictive writing challenge.  Thanks to our host Rochelle Wisoff-Fields of Addicted to Purple   who provides us with a new photo to work with every Wednesday to interpret with a 100 word story. This is an excellent way to fine tune your editing craft.  But it’s okay if you go over or below the word count a little.  I find it challenging to work my story  down or up until I have exactly 100 words. But many go over a little or less.

This week photo is the compliment of   David Stewart

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64 Responses to “Possessed ~ Friday Fictioneer Story”

  1. erinleary Says:

    The story is powerful – I tripped over the use of his name as often as it was in the 100 words, especially the last line. I wanted to read “The firemen never found his body…” since I knew it would by Stymie. Just a small thing that might help.

  2. camgal Says:

    Very dark and well written :) this is going to be funny but I nominated you for the sunshine blogger award http://camgal.wordpress.com/2014/02/23/award-time/

  3. talesfromthemotherland Says:

    Kim, this one is shocking and so powerful. The loss of sanity comes through as Stymie lights that match, and it’s really stunning to read. Well done!

  4. rochellewisoff Says:

    Dear Kim,

    Dark, horrible, believable and well written. Only one bit of crit. It seems your first two sentences should be one divided by a comma. The first sentence is an unfinished phrase. Aside from that…good one.

    Shalom,

    Rochelle

  5. rgayer55 Says:

    All I could think about was Stymie from Little Rascals. I guess he’s burnt toast now.

  6. atrm61 Says:

    How tragic and horrific!Poor soul-wonder what made Stymie immolate himself?Well written:-)

  7. K.Z. Says:

    so tragic and disturbing. but you presented it so well. i feel so sorry for Stymie. and great job with the mysterious ending.

  8. vbholmes Says:

    There seems to be a run on self-destruction in our world right now–so sad, Kim, especially after reading your comment about the Syrian video.

  9. patriciaruthsusan Says:

    That’s a very tragic story but sometimes it happens.. That’s the way some people choose to commit suicide or murder here in India. Cooking fuel is easer to access than a weapon like a gun.

  10. Carolyn Page Says:

    Hard to say ‘well done’, Kim…!
    So dark, and yet portrays so many disturbances of today.

  11. patrickprinsloo Says:

    That’s very dark. Hope you don’t have nightmares.

  12. hugmamma Says:

    Reminded me of the school tragedies that have been happening with some regularity these days. Mental health may affect a few, but it concerns all of us…or it should. Good story…

    • silentlyheardonce Says:

      Yes it should. Our kids today live in a virtual world. Violent movies, video games and gangster rap. Its getting harder to monitor with all the electronics available. Parents don’t have time because the are too busy on their devices. My grand kids want me over all the time because I cook and we talk. Sorry for going off on a rant. Thanks for reading.

  13. Victoria K Gallagher Says:

    Wow, that’s powerful. I gasped quite a few times. Very, very good.

  14. sustainabilitea Says:

    It’s hard to say “good job” in some ways, but you portrayed this terrible situation well.

    janet

  15. Karen Whitelaw Says:

    Ohh, that was unsettling. I felt for the poor narrator witnessing it. Good story.

  16. JackieP Says:

    Well, now, they never found his body? Oh, oh. Great story, though Kim.

  17. Mirada Says:

    Compellingly dark.

  18. plaridel Says:

    they didn’t find his body? i think an angel picked him up and transported him to another place where he could start all over.

  19. Bryan Ens Says:

    a truly tragic piece. Well written.

  20. helenmidgley Says:

    darkly good in so few words, great job :)

  21. Al Says:

    Char-ming ;-)

    Great story of someone who no longer knows how to go on. Excellently written Kim

  22. freyathewriter Says:

    Dark, dark, dark. Just how I like them! Horrible and tragic though, that people feel driven to act this way in real life.

  23. readinpleasure Says:

    What on earth possessed Stymie to do this? :-)

  24. OyiaBrown Says:

    But how can the rope holding the bell not be taut?

  25. Ben Naga Says:

    Hmm. Another postcard, slightly singed and smelling of smoke, from the darker corners of your imagination.


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