Separation Anxiety

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I thought of you for quite a while. Long before we began to know each other well enough to become intimate. For many years we grew together. Our emotions went up and down, in and out. I had a pre-determined idea of where we would go in this relationship. Thinking it would grow and blossom then branch out and move on.

Eight years we have gotten to know each other every precious and painful detail. We went through the motions, I getting frustrated considering tearing you up. There were times I lead and others where you just took over. Other times I was so excited I couldn’t contain myself. Those were the time I went back and edited our relationship.

We have stuck together through sickness and health. I even ignored you through depression when I should have turn to you for comfort. I neglected you at times and had affairs with short stories and poems. But I always ease back into your genre.

We have come a long way from where we began. I thought I was in charge but you were leading me all the way. I keep reviewing, seeing where I needed to tweak and perfect. Scoping for errors and there was always something needing improvement.

Yes I am a bit nervous to move onto the next stage. Exposing our vulnerable selves to be judge, our relationship scrutinized. By others who will deem our union interesting, enchanting or a waste of time.

In any circumstances it’s time I let you go. I will never divorce you but I think an amicable separation will be best.

I just finished the final editing of my novel ‘Hidden Temptation”. I feel like a weight has been lifted. I’m ready to put her out in the wind and see where she blows.

When I started writing ‘Hidden Temptation’ I was still working a nine to five. I would come home and worked early into the mornings. I was focused and finished a quarter of the story in a matter of weeks. When lupus attacked I ignored my novel. Not out of frustration or anger but because the medications made it difficult to focus.

 
It was several years before I my head was clear enough to pick her up again. At first I felt intimidated by the task. I doubted my writing abilities and the story content. But hey not to try is to fail so what the hell, and now I’m finished. The story and the title has changed even the ending I envision has changed. I could keep on editing and never finish then I wouldn’t be able to work on the sequel.

6 thoughts on “Separation Anxiety

  1. Great news, Kim, and I commend you for even starting. Then to make it to the finish line is a big deal! Sometimes I even wonder if I should stop editing but in poetry I think you reach a point where you’re finally satisfied. I’ve never written a novel although it’s been a dream. Who knows? 🙂 Wishing you all the best, my friend…

    1. I’m working on my second book of poetry. I am taking my time and trying to make it a large colletion like the book of Emily Dickinson I had as a teenager. I’ll be deleting all my poems off WP. It will just be short stories an promoting my books.

      1. That sounds wonderful! I’m even thinking of a third book, which I never thought I would. But it would be more probably for next year…good luck with everything! ♥

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