It Was You Once

Google Image.
Google Image.

you smiled even blushed a little. . .
you were so cool. . .
Kangol, gabardine, Adidas. . .
I should have known. . .
you were a player. . .
smoked all my cigarettes. . .
while hypnotizing me with your words. . .
they were smooth. . .
your eyes were gentle. . .
they twinkled with your warm smile. . .
I fell for your sugary words. . .

the first time. . .
your expert fingers touched me. . .
I melted to your will. . .
we fit like mac and cheese. . .
our hearts intertwined. . .
we became one. . .
your fierce lovemaking. . .
I’m still loving you today. . .
after all, all the pain. . .

you came home late. . .
alcohol on your breath. . .
raping me as I slept. . .
I was alone when I gave birth. . .
I had to walk three miles. . .
from the hospital. . .
with your baby in my arms. . .
my blind love still loved you. . .

we moved from there. . .
to here to over there. . .
crack became your lover. . .
the lies you weaved and told. . .
I fell for them. . .
I was still blinded by love. . .
remembering what use to be. . .
I should have sent you away long ago. . .
hope was the string binding us together. . .
maybe it was the fear. . .
of living without you. . .

I watched you become thin. . .
like a number two pencil. . .
crack was eating you raw. . .
from the inside out. . .
valuables were stolen. . .
crack even stole us. . .
dinner was hamburgers. . .
or hot dogs and bread. . .
we froze in the winter. . .
with the boiler off. . .
life was a struggle I hated you. . .
I loved you, when I shouldn’t have. . .

sold the house, lost our memories. . .
you married to have a place to live. . .
I battle illness and cry alone. . .
you would have been there. . .
to take of me. . .
we took care of each other. . .
we were soul mates. . .
now we are incomplete. . .
my world is an illusion. . .
feigning happiness. . .
I’ll squeeze your black-heads. . .
you’ll cut my toes nails. . .
we watch Grease, Hook. . .
and laughed at Bye, Bye Birdie. . .
I’ll do anything for you. . .
everything she wants . . .

ten years do I still know you. . .
you’re sober. . .
you’re big, stronger. . .
I want you. . .
but we can’t afford each other. . .
so you live your life. . .
I live mine. . .
my heart sill feels the lost. . .
the happiness we once shared. . .
is gone, gone, gone. . .

© Kimberly Wilhelmina Floria
2/20/16

Stop by tomorrow and read Living Hurts

One more thing!!! I started new blog Hidden Temptation please follow as I share my writing and upcoming publishing process. As of now I will only be posting there on Tuesdays and now on Thursdays too.

29 thoughts on “It Was You Once

  1. Beautiful. So many questions. Why if it is love can it not be? A tracing of life rendered exquisitely ♡

        1. Thank you I was named after an aunt. I hated when I was growing up. You know how kids tease. They would sing Wilhelmina eat your Farina. I don’t know why it bothered me, I liked Farina. LOL

              1. Haha! Me too! Longer b ama was yikes right? It’s lovely to honor someone, often more than we get back.

  2. the priest spoke on is love blind. it may be it was not kind in your case nor mine finding out the one you loved was less than shall we say perfect. and we all had kids and the things we did to make it as right for them my friend some things transcend the man woman color of your skin. i feel your pain and dig the way you write about it. well done!

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