Good morning, it might not be morning where you are, it might not be morning when you read this. Actually it might not even be morning when I finish writing and press post. But either way I wanted to greet you.
After my surgery I learned my lungs are deteriorating even more, I had two bouts with lung cancer, I have COPD, pulmonary hypertension, Emphysema and now a new diagnosis of idiopathic pulmonary fibrosis. I was taking a pill that was helping for one thing and at the same time causing damage to my lungs.
They are running these commercials showing people all the horrible things that can result from smoking. Consider this my commercial. I was born in 1960 in a household where everyone smoked. The following story isn’t a lie my grandmother wanted to teach me a lesson.
You know how children mimics adults? I would take the butts out the ashtrays and pretend to smoke. This one day my grandmother cleared off the dining room table and put an ashtray and a Chesterfield regular (a strong filter less cigarette) in front of me. I was supposed to choke, cough, get sick or something. Instead I took that cigarette and sucked smoke in and blew it out my mouth and nose. Grand was angry and my brother who was a teenager was laughing his head off. Funny that’s my earliest memory. After that, when I was 8 years old I started stealing cigarettes and smoking in the bathroom. I’m paying for all my smoking today.
I don’t need oxygen when I’m sitting but my saturation level drops when I walk so I use the O2 when I go out. I cough all the time, my chest always feels tight. You know how people tell you when something is easy it’s like breathing. For me I am aware of every breath I take. If you smoke let it go the rewards are not worth it. I smoked 40 years when I stopped in 2008.
I got off track, that’s not what I planned to write about. I guess that’s what the universe felt I should share. Originally I was going to share that my recovery from the surgery was difficult but the recovery from the election was harder. I’m following almost every news story hoping for the results to be thrown out, for 45 to be impeached and now they are suggesting the election can be nullify. In any incident this election has made me mad (insane).
I need to get back to meditating I finally did this morning. Below is the mantra I used and will use until I heal from this election. I am not concerned about me, my clock is running out of time. I worry about the future for my kids. I have a new grandson, if February had 30 days he would be two months in a few days. What kind of life will he have with and/or after this administration.
Open my Chakras to
tranquility and serenity
Resist stress and fear
Do not conform
Accept what can not be changed
Resist the hate and the liars
Open my Chakras
to Love and peace
Release my inner glow
To light my circumference
To help guide those
Who are also lost and wandering
In the winds of negativity
(C) Kimberly Wilhelmina Floria 2/25/17
I don’t know what I’ll be blogging about for now I guess I’ll just share my thoughts and feelings.
Thanks for helping with the cover.